MARRIAGE IS MORE THAN PUTTING A RING ON THE FINGER

By Rev Michael Benson Ajayi

  Matt 19:7-10 NIV..”The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."

        Under the Old Testament women were considered as spoils of war. They were seen as objects of pleasure, the scriptures says in Deut 21:11-14 “ And suppose you see among the captives a beautiful woman, and you are attracted to her and want to marry her…. ” But if you marry her and she does not please you, you must let her go free. You may not sell her or treat her as a slave, for you have humiliated her” Based on this, women are considered as inferior to their male counterparts in some religions.

      Every male was conceived by a female just like an orange tree produces fruits; therefore it is illogical to say that the fruit is superior to the tree that bore it. In the beginning, God cloned a woman out of a man’s body part therefore none is inferior to the other. Societies that encourage women oppression never attain their full potentials. Women definitely have something to offer.The oppression of women is a sign of insecurity by men. 

        Under the dispensation of grace, women have equal rights with men (Gal 3:28) . Men can also be held liable in the event of infidelity unlike in the Old Testament where he could bring in as many women as he so pleased. This makes a case against polygamy; if polygamy is to be accepted then women should be given the right to marry more than one husband. The married woman has equal matrimonial rights as much as the man according to the marriage covenant that binds them as one entity,it is against this backdrop that Jesus said in Matthew 19:9 "And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marries her which is put away doth committeth adultery." Adultery is sex (physical or imagined) (Matt5:28) outside one’s marriage covenant  as ordained by God.       

          The word ‘fornication’ is the Greek word ‘porneia’ from where we get the word pornography and it means harlotry (including adultery and incest): and figuratively, idolatry. God likens sex to worship ( Jer.3:90). Unconsciously, our sex partner becomes our source of joy instead of God and outside a marriage covenant, he or she eventually plays the role of a god and frustrates our worship of the true God. 

     Jesus Christ in Matt19:9 says the man who puts his wife away EXCEPT on the grounds of fornication (sexual immorality, idolatry) is responsible for creating the opportunity for his wife’s infidelity: this is often caused by emotional adultery( flirting) by men (Matt5:28) and the man who marries the estranged woman becomes guilty of  adultery. Jesus said Matt 19:11 KJV “All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given.” This means those who argue against this truth make themselves vulnerable to adultery. In marriage, couples operate as one flesh (Mk 10:8) thus if the wife is guilty the husband is automatically guilty. This was the reason the disciples rejected the idea of marriage (Matt19:10).    
         The phrase ‘ doth committeth’ is the archaic word ‘does commit’  which is in a present- continuous tense . This means the three persons in (Matt 19:9) are bound by adultery . Pornography feeds this addiction.  Marriage is sacred, precious, pure, and permanent. It is a final, irrevocable commitment that marks the end of selfish desires by the parties involved and requires the daily guidance of the Holy Ghost. Receive grace for integrity in your relationship as you read this now  in Jesus name. 
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